comment on Jia Khan suicide: When the love falls apart….keep your life together!


So once again, a sad outcome for a young working girl…Jia Khan who was apparently an ambitious and smart girl; with youth on her side…working in an unpredictable industry that allows one to thrive but without believing it will last for a long time. As the highs so the lows….Making her debut opposite an established film maker like Ram Gopal Verma, and the iconic Amitabh was not enough to secure a career fillip for the foreseeable future. Even working in other A grade films did not likely assure that she would make it to be a success story.
It is interesting, how our expectation from our youth to have responsibilities has reduced and dreams have multiplied. This is a global phenomenon, a counselor Camillie says “the age for everything has moved but not for independence and work.” The modern society does not allow the space for working and reworking to make the best fit solution for our future and goals. So overwhelmed with emotions and ambitions, our youth are transitioning into unsure adults with reduced capacity for coping with stress and situations.
The emerging adulthood implies that it is a form of kaccha ghara, meaning it has yet to be molded, yet to be completely formed, go over kiln, and then…after experiencing a little hot a little cold and a little wet…all uncomfortable places to be in, it will finally emerge as a pot of some shape or size, with a capacity to hold… Youth holds within it the potential for amazing feats and also the vulnerability to collapse much like the not yet formed clay, only because it has a shape or looks beautiful, does not mean it is ready.
There is ample evidence to show that youth are susceptible to and at risk for suicide with the 15 to 29 being the age range for highest risk in India, for maximum risk and conflict in relationships being the most likely cause; an hanging, poisoning, and drowning the most common means. Even then the access to mental health counseling and risk assessment remains low in urban India that has considerable stressors and increased loneliness and support systems
Even though people who attempt suicide might not want to die and those who wish to die might not attempt suicide, at least in our parts of the world, there are still not many levels of accepting this way of losing life; thank fully. However increased online access to crazy groups that support and solicit suicides is an additional risk to vulnerable young people. There are scales like the hopelessness scale and depression inventories that can predict with some accuracy if someone is likely to attempt suicide…..
Ultimately it boils down to whether there is in every young person’s life that one person; they can reach out to, talk, and trust. And whether even when they are in love or intensely attached to other people, that one person is as much part of their lives… we cannot ignore the needs and changing situations and desires of our young people, we cannot stop the change.. maybe, BUT we can definitely be a part of their experience of this change in the same old way….by making ourselves a part of their lives…by maintaining constant communication….by keeping the traditions of being a family, being friends, being neighbors….just the way we used to…it does help to have people to talk to…even when it is the daily daal bhaat conversation… ultimately, that is life and you can live it well only with many others….who make up for the loss of one or two relationships and can reinforce that that is not your whole life.

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About Chun Mun

Chun Mun are bloggers for E-Women! All the women from the Indian Subcontinent, who have anything to say are a part of the Ewomen Indian world and have this space to share their thoughts. We might not endorse or support any of their thoughts but we endorse and support their right to speak and share their opinions. Ewomen is a document on women's journey as women Reclaim their own identity and Create and Contribute to the lives of others.
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